12.15.12

I can stand up in front of 30 kids all day with nothing but a sheet of paper and be ok... but standing up in front of a church full of people... and read a simple prayer.. EEEHHH not so much!  When I agreed to light the Advent Wreath... I did not realize we would also read a prayer.. then  I said ok.. Jordan will read.. yeah NO, Jordan stated he was lighting the candles ( probably a better idea anyway to let him do what he is used to doing) and that Mackenzie and I would be responsible for the prayer... LOVELY. I taught Mackenzie some of it so she could get up there "and talk into the microphone" as she told everyone today...  There are many people who are AWESOME and it seems like they do not have any issues.. Pastor Mary is one the greatest public speakers I know.... I as my friend said tonight.. I need confidence...  or to run and HIDE.... I wish Mackenzie could read!!!

OK Holy Spirit working here... as I typed this... Pastor Mary text'd me back about something else... really those who do not believe... let me tell you a few stories on how really amazing the Holy Spirit is...

When some things were going on this past year.. I would receive e-mails from Pastor Mary or Morning Whispers with exact messages of things that were needed at that VERY moment (pulling into a place), my friend was asked to sing at a memorial service the day before (on a day she normally works the morning) her morning was cancelled the exact same day they called and asked her to sing.... really.... 

I know that especially right now there are people who are angry with God... I spent the better part of 25 years angry with God or blaming God for my mother's death.  On and off for years, I tried to accept her death and stop blaming, but until this year, until it was actually explained to me in a way that I could understand it... I wasn't seeing that God does not allow bad things to happen... we have free will, bad things happen, but God is always here for us to talk to and to help us when they do happen.   

It is upsetting to read posts on FB or to listen to people on the news ... I pray that those who do not know things, do not say things and those who need help seek it.... May we all spend a little more time lending a hand.. as we continue to deal with Sandy and now the Sandy Hook tragedy as well...  Check this out....May help...
http://www.holytrinity-elca.org/index.php/worship/sermons/99-wilderness-johns-and-ours-december-8-9-2012?fb_action_ids=4127344382485&fb_action_types=og.likes&fb_source=aggregation&fb_aggregation_id=288381481237582